Grammar · Modal Verbs

Advice: Should, Ought To & Had Better

Friendly advice or a serious warning? Learn when to say “should” and when to say “had better” with the film The Blind Side.

B1Modal Verbs

Grammar › Modal Verbs › Advice: Should, Ought To & Had Better

The rule in one sentenceUse should (or ought to) for friendly advice, and had better for a warning, when something bad will happen if you don’t listen.

About the film

The Blind Side is a 2009 film based on a true story. Leigh Anne Tuohy sees a quiet teenager, Michael Oher, walking alone on a cold night. She tells him he had better come home with her family. Soon, they think he should try American football.

What does it do?

We use these words to tell someone what the best action is. should is the most common. It gives a friendly idea or an opinion. If the person doesn’t follow it, nothing terrible happens.

ought to means the same as should, but it is a little more formal and less common. had better is much stronger. It is a warning: do this now, or there will be a problem.

Michael should eat a good breakfast every day.

You had better take a coat. It’s freezing tonight.

Leigh Anne thinks he should join the school team.

Michael had better pass his tests, or he can’t play.

Look at the first and third tiles. They are good ideas, but there is no danger. The second and fourth tiles are warnings. There is a clear problem if the person doesn’t listen.

Friendly advice

Warning

+ You should go.

+ You had better go.

− You shouldn’t go.

− You had better not go.

? Should I go?

? (very rare)

also You ought to go.

short You’d better go.

In speech, people almost always use the short forms:

should not → shouldn’tyou had better → you’d betterwe had better not → we’d better not’d better = had better, not “would”

Michael should have a warm bed. It’s freezing, so he’d better get in the car now.
The first is a good idea. The second is urgent. It is cold and dark, and he needs to be safe now.

Visual guide

🎨

Teacher Teddy’s illustrated guide to this rule is being drawn — the full swipe-through infographic will appear here soon.

How to make it

should — friendly advice

person+should+base verb

person+ought to+base verb

Michael should talk more about his feelings.

−

S.J. shouldn’t give Michael so much advice about football.

No “to” after should, and no “don’t”.

Should Michael stay with the family?

Put “should” first to ask for advice.

had better — a warning

person+had better+base verb

person+had better not+base verb

You’d better study hard, or your grades will stay low.

−

We’d better not be late for the game.

“Not” goes after “better”, never after “had”.

Hadn’t we better call Leigh Anne?

Questions are possible but very rare. Most people use “should”.

When to use each one

should — ideas and opinions

A good idea: Michael should ask for help with his homework.
Your opinion: I think every child should have a safe home.
Asking for advice: What should I say to him?
A little formal: The school ought to give him more time.

had better — warnings

Danger: You’d better not walk home in this cold.
No time to lose: We’d better leave now. The game starts soon.
A bad result: He’d better improve his grades, or he can’t play.
A strong message: You’d better be kind to him.

Words that help: advice or warning?

Some words in the sentence tell you which one to use.

should → a friendly idea

I thinkmaybein my opinionif I were youit’s a good ideaperhaps

had better → a warning

orotherwiseright nowbefore it’s too lateor elsehurry up

Common mistakes

❌ Michael should to study more.

✅ Michael should study more.

No “to” after “should”.

❌ You ought take a coat.

✅ You ought to take a coat.

“Ought” always needs “to”.

❌ You had better to hurry, or we’ll be late.

✅ You had better hurry, or we’ll be late.

No “to” after “had better”.

❌ We hadn’t better miss the game.

✅ We’d better not miss the game.

The negative is “had better not”.

One more thing

This part is a little harder. You can come back to it later.

“Had better” is about now or the future, not the past. The word “had” looks like the past, but the meaning is not. To talk about a past mistake, use should have.
✅ You’d better call Leigh Anne tonight. (now or soon)
✅ You should have called her yesterday. (a past mistake)

Practice: choose the right word

Eight questions. Choose one answer. You get the answer, and why.

1. I think Michael ___ try American football.

“I think” shows an opinion → should.

2. It’s freezing. You ___ come inside, or you’ll get ill.

There is a real danger → had better.

3. Michael should ___ more at school.

No “to” after should.

4. You ___ thank the Tuohys.

“Ought” always needs “to”.

5. We’d better ___ late, or the coach will be angry.

“Not” comes after “better”.

6. ___ I tell Leigh Anne about my bad grades?

We ask for advice with should.

7. Maybe you ___ read more books this summer.

“Maybe” shows a friendly idea → should.

8. He’d better ___ his test, or he can’t play on Friday.

No “to” after had better.

Your turn

Choose one ending. Then listen to your sentence.

I think I should …

It’s late. I’d better …

Every sentence here is correct. Pick the one that is true for you. Say it out loud too!

Keep going

Next lessonAlone vs Lonely →

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Modals of Obligation & Permission (Must, Have To, Can) Mustn’t vs Don’t Have To Should Have, Could Have & Would Have Requests, Offers & Suggestions

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Advice: Should, Ought To & Had Better — English Grammar (B1)